Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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