I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
