At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
