either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Randomize
