Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
