Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
