it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
