There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
