do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize