I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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