WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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