So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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