I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize