this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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