Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
