So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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