i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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