i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize