some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
you have to choose: penises or morals?
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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