Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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