It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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