Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize
