I'm really into asian looking animals
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
It's blow job season.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
