they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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