Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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