I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
