We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
