What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize