If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize