Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Randomize
