i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Randomize
