At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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