would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
