bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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