is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
