Three words: puerto rican gang bang
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
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