I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
