I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
