he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Come see our sink grown plant.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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