Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize
