I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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