It's Friday. Sex?
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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