I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Randomize
