BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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