He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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