I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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