Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
