loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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