How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Randomize