I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
