your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
