Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Panties = found
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
